Equipping the Littlest Crew Members and Caring for Families
Remy was a teacher in her home country, The Netherlands, for 8 years when she began to feel that change was coming. Knowing about Mercy Ships, Remy didn’t realize there were volunteer teachers on board! She eagerly applied for a 2-year commitment and 11 years later, she’s still caring for children and families on board our ships.
With a passion for children’s development, not only academically, but socially and emotionally, Remy began to equip children for the transition to ship life and help families navigate this big life change when coming aboard.
In this episode, Remy shares about how hard times bring community together, the importance of showing children that they are valued, and her own time of self-discovery on board.
If you’ve ever wondered about bringing your family on board and how the transition will be for your children — you won’t want to miss this episode. Looking for a way to join our mission of bringing hope and healing? Partner with us through a gift, volunteering with us, or by joining us in prayer.
New Mercies Podcast Transcript
Welcome to the New Mercies, a podcast by Mercy Ships, where we’ll take you behind the scenes and on board our incredible hospital ships that are transforming lives all over the world. We invite you to join us each week as we sit down with our crew, patients, volunteers, and partners to hear their stories of life-changing hope and healing.
Remy van den Bogaerdt has one of the most important jobs with Mercy Ships. She equips and cares for all the children and their families that go live on board our hospital ships with a big heart to make sure our littlest crew members are seen and loved. Remy is dedicated to helping families make the big transition to ship life. Here is my interview with Remy van den Bogaerdt.
Raeanne Newquist:
Well, this is a treat for me to get to spend some time speaking with you Remy and I know it’s going to be a treat for our listeners as well. So welcome to the podcast.
Remy van den Bogaerdt:
Thank you, Raeanne. It’s a blessing to be here.
Raeanne:
Well, it’s so much fun for me, I know that you made such an impact on my children several years ago, when we were transitioning to coming onboard the Africa Mercy. You helped ease that transition for the kids. And we’re going to talk about that later. But right now, why don’t you tell us where you’re at and what you’re doing these days.
Remy:
Currently, I live remotely or work remotely from the Netherlands. That’s where I’m from. I work from my own little house where I spend most of my days in front of a computer. And my title is the family member care chaplain, which is a mouthful, we like to do long titles with Mercy Ships.
So really, in essence, it just means that I come alongside families. I come alongside the other crew as well. But my main focus is to families, and I help them prepare, I help them transition. I give them resources for tools and my main focus or goal within this role is that children will know that there’s someone in the organization specifically reaching out to them to be their voice, be their support as they walk this out.
Raeanne:
I love that, you know, we’ve talked a lot on the podcast about kids on board, we just had Nikki Aldum on a little bit ago talking about, you know, pursuing excellence in our education for our children on board. But more than that, to know that they’re loved and seen and cared for is really important, because it’s a big transition for kids. You know, there’s a lot of amazing things. It’s filled with wonder. It’s kind of like Disneyland for kids to be on this big ship and have almost complete freedom to go anywhere and do anything they want. But it’s a big change. So, I appreciate what you do. And I’m so excited to hear a little more about that. But you’ve been with Mercy Ships about 11 years. So what were you doing prior to all of this? And what was it that prompted you to come volunteer with Mercy Ships?
Remy:
I never thought. Let’s start with that. I never thought I would say this long. I think a lot of people say that within our organization. But I was a teacher before. I’ve always felt called to be a teacher. That was my goal. I went to college and worked at a Christian school in the Netherlands for eight years. And I really loved it. It was really not a need for me to look elsewhere. But I did feel God just stirring my heart in the last years of that school, I felt very much that he had something new for me as other people my age were moving on to raising families and going into a different chapter of their lives. I felt that God had something different for me. I just didn’t know what it was. I thought maybe a new degree and so I got my master’s in behavior. Just working with kids that are a little bit more challenged in certain areas. That wasn’t quite it either. I thought maybe a change of school. That wasn’t quite it either. Until I learned about Mercy Ships, and I’ve heard about Mercy Ships, it’s very well known here in the Netherlands, but not teaching — I had no idea there was a school so I didn’t know and I heard from someone that volunteered on board and I thought man maybe this is it. My own comfort zone though started kicking in that I didn’t really feel led to Africa and I never really felt traveling was in my future.
Raeanne:
We know that it has been in your present as been I’m traveling quite a lot!
Remy:
So, people would actually joke about it when I raised this whole new thing that I signed up for people said oh a ship you’re seasick, you’re motion sick and you’re traveling in Africa, it’s hot. And so, it kind of became a joke a little bit in my family like I was doing this thing, which for me was kind of reassurance in the sense that this is clearly what God wants me to do. And not I want to do necessarily. And so, I just applied, and I thought, I’m going to just give it back to God. And if he wants me to be on that ship, I will be accepted. And if not, I will not come to the ship. And so, it clearly opened all the doors. One through that application did my training in Texas, and I ended up teaching fourth and fifth grade on board, two years turned into three, three turned into four. That’s kind of what I’ve done for the first four years on board the Africa Mercy.
Raeanne:
So, tell us a little bit about your time on board. Obviously, this wasn’t completely on your radar, maybe not being someone who’s prone to travel a lot or do some adventurous things. And now here you are on a ship in West Africa teaching, what was it like for you?
Remy:
A mix of hard and wonderful, I loved the teaching experience. That was something I knew I was trained for it. I enjoyed it, I really, really loved working in an international setting. Learning that there’s more than one way to do education and not just the Dutch way, or there’s a whole lot of ways of doing it. And I love learning from all my students that are from all over the world. I remember very specifically having to learn to be open to them teaching me because many of them had been on board for many years. And they knew that the ship from the bow all the way to the stern. And they knew exactly how everything worked. And I had to be the student. And so, it was very humbling to have them show me how things were done.
You know, being in a different nation, being in Africa, seeing a lot of suffering, living with other cultures, and in a small cabin with three cabin mates, it was challenging. But it’s the challenging seasons that grow us. And so, it was a mix of a lot of stuff.
Raeanne:
What was the highlight moment for you, kind of like that standout moment of impact that when someone asks you tell us about your time on board, that’s the first thing that comes to mind?
Remy:
Honestly, when I was thinking about that, I immediately go to experiences that really weren’t that great, yet they turn into a really great memory. And I’m thinking about the time when Ebola was in West Africa. And obviously, that’s a hard season when we had that virus going around West Africa. And that meant that our ship was sort of stuck in Tenerife, because we couldn’t go back to West Africa. And we had to go through a whole lot of waiting, what is next? Where are we going, and my job still continued, I still had to teach those children yet we’re kind of in no man’s land. Even though that was hard, it was beautiful as well, because as a community, you rally together, you support one another you when someone feels low or feels discouraged, and a person comes alongside and prays and encourages each other. And I loved seeing that.
Another time was in Madagascar when a cyclone was moving our way. And there were a lot of conversations about maybe we have to evacuate the ship and all the patients have to come on board and not a fun memory in a way. But at the same time it stuck in my mind still to this day, because that was the time where the whole community had to come together. And we had to work together as a team. And we had to support one another. So it’s really those experiences that became highlights for me.
Raeanne:
Well, I think it’s unique to walk through really challenging seasons of life or not even seasons, challenging moments, you know, of a cyclones coming, what are we going to do? It’s unique to walk through that with a community. Oftentimes, we’re facing tough things in our lives alone, or maybe with just one other person, but to experience 100 – 200 plus people coming together in the midst of a crisis, or in the midst of a hard thing, that is powerful, and it builds community deeply, quickly. And it’s something that’s it’s a gift to be a part of that.
Remy:
Yeah, absolutely. And realizing that we’re not supposed to do it alone. We’re supposed to do it together. And that’s how God created it. You know, he created us to be in families to be in community, but you never really experienced something like that until you move, like me, to a ship where you get to be surrounded by people and see the beauty of it.
Raeanne:
So it sounds like your life prior to getting on board was pretty different than your life on board. What were some things that maybe you discovered about yourself?
Remy:
I think one of the things that was mentioned during the onboarding program, and I went through myself was something that I don’t exactly know the exact words, but something in the sense of you are no longer dependent of a church. And that kind of made me think as I grew up as a Christian back home, and I was part of a church, how much I let the church guide me and support me, which is not a bad thing. But I think, in living on the ship far away, I realized I need to build my own relationship with God, I have to be responsible for my own growth in faith with God. And I cannot just sit back and let my church do all the pouring into me, and providing opportunities like a sermon and Bible studies, which absolutely that’s the church’s role as well to support but I have to take responsibility. I have to walk this out with God. And even though the ship provides services as well, and there’s chaplaincy, you’re very much now really brought to your knees and saying, God, show me what you want me to do. And I needed to take responsibility of that. So I think that would be one big shift that I’ve seen in my own life.
Another thing that I have noticed is how much I was an introvert. I think I am. But I think living in community has also helped me to become maybe a little bit more extroverted and be maybe a little bit more comfortable in bigger groups. People would definitely not say that about me that I’m introverted. But I think the ship definitely showed me that I really needed that time by myself. And it was people everywhere. And there’s a stretching season, right?
Raeanne:
Yeah, that’s so funny because my husband and I are very different. I’m much more of an extrovert, he’s more of an introvert. And you get on this ship and like you said, you can’t really run and hide anywhere, you’re with people all the time. And I know when we would be in our cabin, which is literally at the very end of the ship, we would go to the dining room and there would be two ways to go, we could either go straight out our cabin, you know, right across the midships into the dining room, or we could go downstairs and anyways, I would always opt to travel from our cabin to the dining room in the most populated space, like, where’s there going to be the most people midships? Let’s go this way. And my husband be like, I’ll meet you there. You know, he would walk a different route just needing that break from so many people. And you do you learn a lot about yourself. It’s a fun experience.
Being four years on board with the children teaching, you probably saw a lot of their awakenings as well, their self-discovery, their transition, what were some things that you observed about the children and their families as they were transitioning to ship life?
Remy:
I think one of the things I’ve learned, also in my current role, and obviously working with kids on boarding and on the ship is that what we see is not always what’s there. Sometimes we see a certain expression, and we see a sort of response from children and doesn’t mean that that’s actually the way they’re actually feeling or thinking. They can be quite adaptable, they can be quite aware of their surroundings and can adapt to what is needed, specifically older children. But it doesn’t mean that they don’t need help in their walking through transition. So I think that probably is one of the things — for example, I was walking by one of our crew members and she stopped me one day and she said, Well, I think you really need to talk to your students and teach them some etiquette, some respect, and some being a little bit more respectful to other crew members. And so I asked a little bit of what do you mean by that? Well, I just saw one of your students and said, good morning and they didn’t answer me back.
And so I mulled over that a little bit and just trying to figure out, is that really a sign of disrespect? Or have they already said good morning 200 times on their own? And they’re just a little tired, so there’s one of the challenges that our children face. It’s amazing and it’s incredible, but just as much as we are trying to adjust as adults, children are trying to adjust as well, they’re just doing it in a very different level. They often don’t have the vocabulary yet, or the emotional awareness yet to express their feelings and what they’re thinking. And so it comes out a certain way. But it doesn’t mean that that’s actually how they’re really feeling. And so I think with our children, they need some guidance in how do they live this life and missions far away from friends and family, surrounded by a lot of different views. How can we sort of help them, they’re really wet cement. And so whatever happens in their formative years, leaves a mark, leaves an impact. And so it’s very vital, how we come alongside them.
Raeanne:
That’s a great point, that these experiences that these children are having, they’re really going to impact them for the rest of their life. And the way that we steward that season is important. I love that our teachers on board are intentional with that. And it sounds like you know, some of the crew also need a little bit of prepping, if you will, you can’t expect a little one to say good morning to you, and think that they’re being rude if they don’t, maybe there’s a lot of other things going on. It’s a big transition for kids to come on board. It’s a big transition for anyone to come on board, right. But especially for the little ones. And I love that Mercy Ships is really intentional about caring for our kids.
So I know, after four years of teaching on board, you transitioned to life in East Texas, so from the Netherlands to a couple countries in Africa, and now you are in East Texas at this time. So tell us about that transition, and then tell us about the program that you headed up in Texas.
Remy:
So after those four years, I definitely felt my time on board was over. I didn’t have a doubt about that. I think it was a good season. But I was ready to leave the ship. However, I didn’t quite feel settled on moving back to the Netherlands, if I was ready to do that I could pick up teaching again. So I definitely wasn’t was praying about what was next, but didn’t have a direction or anything. And then someone from the IOC reached out and said would you be interested in a position at the IOC. And this particular position was within the onboarding team — onboarding is our program to prepare our long term crew members for service onboard. And they wanted me to be part of that with a specific focus just on families. And on the kids onboarding program, which at the time, ran once a year, didn’t take me a whole lot of time to decide that I that I wanted to say yes to that. Even though yes, Texas.
I think that was the hardest transition yet. I didn’t see it coming. And I think it’s because I felt as a Westerner in the Netherlands, going to another western country I didn’t suspect it being that hard. Because I knew the language. I had been to America before. And so I thought well, yeah, I think I can do that. It’s going to be easier than going to West Africa. Not true. Texas is a whole other culture. That’s what I’ve learned. Yes.
Raeanne:
So you transitioned to work in East Texas at the ISC working in onboarding. And as you mentioned, no one really prepared you for that transition. We do a lot of preparation, you know, transitioning people on the ship and off the ship. But what does it look like to move to a whole other culture, a whole other country? You’re in the midst of transitioning yet again, yourself? And now you’re helping kids transition to be on board? Tell us what that was like? And was there a moment and helping the kids transition that maybe it was helping your transition as well?
Remy:
Absolutely. In my work with kids, I’ve always felt like they’re pouring into me just as much as I’m pouring into them. I’ve always felt that it was a mutual sort of relationship. Working with kids is just very freeing. They’re very honest, very affirming. And as I did my lessons with them, and we talk about transitions, and we talk about emotions, it’s good stuff to hear for all of us all the time. I sometimes feel like all adults should just hear the kids onboarding content. The adult content is really good too. But there’s simple ways of explaining things to children that I think sometimes as adults we benefit from as well. I absolutely loved doing that piece. I loved working with kids and their emotional transition. And reflecting back on my years as a teacher, I think I’ve always leaned towards more the social emotional development than to academic development, obviously that’s very important and as a teacher, I support that. But I’ve always leaned more towards how they are doing socially and emotionally, because if they’re doing well in those areas, then the learning will come. And so I’ve loved that we have that program where we set aside that time for our children and saying, I’m going to pour into you because you are a valued member of our Mercy Ships family, and not because your parents are here, but because you are here. And I’ve loved just designing, adding, building on the program that already exist. It’s been a wonderful journey to learn more about third culture kids and their needs and their amazing benefits, but also some of their challenges naming those challenges not walking away from those.
Raeanne:
Can you give us a specific example of just maybe one thing that you teach in kids onboarding?
Remy:
I think one of the main things that I loved is teaching a little bit about what our Third Culture kids, what is that piece that you’re now carrying with you, teaching them the difference between this is not who you are, because we don’t want to label, but this is sort of helping you explain the experiences that you’re going to have, and how their roots are slightly different, and what it looks like when you are born and born in one culture and then you live and work in another culture, and then you go back and how that impacts you.
Love that whole process of just giving them words to something that they will see later on — during kids onboarding, they may not fully grasp it. But you’re giving them some tools that as soon as they’re on board, and they’re living that life, and they are feeling some of the just the transition and the chaos and the questions, they now have some words to explain it and like, oh, okay, I get it, because I’m coming from this culture. And now I’m affected by this country. And I’m seeing all these different cultures around me. And of course, that affects my roots, and then followed by, but who are you really rooted in? So even though you are a third culture kid, roots are in all these different cultures. Who are you rooted in? And to help them come alongside them a little bit to help them see who are they anchored in. Are they anchored in their things, their toys, their friends? Or are they anchored in in Jesus and how much Jesus loves them, you know, you present it to them, because they’re still having to make that choice. And they still have to make their way through their own faith development in their faith journey. But I love having that incorporated in our program. It’s beautiful.
Raeanne:
And I love how the program teaches these things through games and crafts and different things I know my children learned in kids on boarding, and then brought those things to the ship, whether it be a little tree that they made, or some kind of crafts that then hung in our cabin as reminders of things that they learned. But it’s such a beautiful, beautiful program. So intentional, so important. And I know for you, it was a really a beautiful fit for you to be the one heading up that program. How long did you do that? And then when did you transition to Family Care chaplaincy? What you’re doing now,
Remy:
I did that for about three years. So between my time on the ship and moving to Texas, there was a bit of a season because I had to wait for my visa to come through that I did that for about three years. And then I had another major transition, where I had to say goodbye to this program that I really love loved dearly. So I moved into my current role, where I care for families on board.
Raeanne:
Well, I know that you have been a blessing to so many families in the past. And really I love that you’re in a role now that you get to continue to bless families and encourage them throughout their Mercy Ships journey. And really beyond that, as well. As we wrap up our time together. I would love to hear from you maybe one closing thing of how Mercy Ships has really transformed your life in the last 11 years. And why it is that you continue to serve. I think God has used Mercy Ships as a tool to push me out of my comfort zone, one little step at a time. I think just being exposed to different views and different perspectives, different ways of doing it. It can be very chaotic, and it can be very confusing. And I think it has forced me to really dive deep into his arms. Like I said earlier, I had to learn to really depend on him. And only him and not through a church or through a Bible study or through books, which are all very good, but I had to really learn on trusting. If I want you to go there, will you follow me, and just blindly following Him wherever He calls me. And like I said before, I never intended to stay 11 years. Yet, if I look at all the turns and twists and memberships journey, has become so evident to me that it’s got all the time leading. But that has been very scary. Because as you go see anything, you sort of have to step out on this path that you don’t even see in front of you. Being asked to to kind of pioneer roles that didn’t exist before being verbalizing the need that you see, but not sure if people will support that or agree with that, or I had to really just trust God’s guidance. Another thing that I think Mercy Ships has transformed me and is that I think Mercy Ships is a great place to grow in confidence grow and the gifts that God has placed in you, being exposed to other ways of working sometimes shows you pieces about yourself that you didn’t even know you had strengths that you had, or gifts that God has given you that you didn’t even know that you had. And so the chips is really brought up and brought out of a lot of stuff. And God definitely used Mercer’s was as a tool to transform me in that way, and to just create me more into who he wants me to be.
I love that. Well, we are so grateful for you are so grateful for the gifts that God has given you and the ones that he’s continuing to equip you with, so that families feel loved and kids feel seen and cared for as they make this huge leap to go and serve. So thank you for all that you do. And thank you so much for sharing with us a little bit about it today. Oh, thank you so much, Carrie Anne for reaching out and just catching up with me and it’s been a blessing to see you again after so many years ago as I worked with your kids, so thank you. onboard our ships.
For more information about Mercy Ships, go to mercyships.org, and to keep up with the guests on New Mercies, follow us on Instagram at NewMerciesPodcast.